Category: successful wedding tips

Is it time for a Virtual Wedding?

In the time of social distancing and “Shelter In” orders, couples are still moving forward with their wedding plans.  2020 was a really important year for many couples because of the mark of a new decade and everyone loves to celebrate big events during double numbers.  

The latest trend has been to move bigger events and celebrations online and weddings are no exception.  Just because the venue celebration had to be postponed, couples still want to get married on their original wedding date.  Instead of putting off the marriage you can have a professional officiant perform your ceremony online.  Invite all of your loved ones to an online meeting room and get married with everyone present.

Another alternative is to hire a local officiant to meet you in a safe setting like a rooftop or open outdoor space and have your loved ones attend the streaming of the ceremony.

I recently performed a ceremony on a rooftop in Chelsea for a couple who couldn’t wait another minute and it turned out to be the most romantic wedding I have ever done.  We are all looking forward to celebrating life and these moments make us feel hopeful and excited about the future.  I am currently offering online Virtual services and outdoor elopements in New York City this spring.  Contact me at info@commongroundceremonies.com to learn more.

Should you ask a friend or family member to marry you or hire an officiant?

Weddings can be expensive and most couples today will seek creative ways to cut down on costs. Some of the most popular recent trends is to ask a friend or relative to DJ, take photos or even officiate the wedding ceremony to save those dineros.  As an experienced professional Wedding Officiant in New York for the past 10 years, I have seen many versions of this plan work successfully, however I have noticed a recent increase in being called in at the last minute to come to the rescue because the couple’s alternative “money saving” plan fell apart, which ultimately costs engaged couples even more in stress and time. 

Since officiating is my personal expertise, I have put together a list of things to research and consider before you decide to ask your friend or relative to officiate your wedding: 

  • Does my friend/relative have any experience with public speaking?
  • Does my friend/relative know me and my partner well enough to truly represent us?
  • If they do a “not so great” job will it damage our relationship?
  • How does my friend/relative view marriage? Are they happily married?  (Note: This matters in case they try to throw in some unsolicited advice during your ceremony and believe me, THIS HAPPENS!!
  • Can my friend/relative handle any last-minute changes or requests either made by us, the venue, or the other vendors?
  • Does my friend/relative have an engaging, welcoming personality to make our guests feel included?
  • Does the location where I plan to wed allow non-professional clergy to officiate weddings and sign legal documents?
  • Will my marriage be legal?

When you hire a professional wedding officiant or celebrant, they bring a level of expertise and experience to the most important day of your journey as a couple.  Many Officiants (specifically the ones who have attended seminary) are also ordained ministers and pre-marital counselors who can offer you the support and valuable tools needed to start your marriage on the right track. Also, when you develop a relationship with your officiant, you gain a counselor, a friend and neutral guide to support you through the many challenges and offerings that marriage inevitably brings. 

As an Interfaith Minister and Wedding Officiant in New York, I have developed long-lasting relationships with my couples and I often have the privilege to perform Baby Blessings for their children, Vow Renewals and other big celebrations in their family and friend circle.  Most importantly, as a professional Pre-Marital Counselor, I assist in building a foundation for success which begins before the wedding and helps you through the planning process.

For bookings and more information about my officiating and counseling services, please contact Rev. Samora Smith at rev.samora@gmail.com

What to Do When you have Problems with Your Bridesmaids

Every bride seeks help on how to deal with problematic bridesmaids. Some problems occur when the bridesmaids have never met each other and they can find it extremely difficult to get along. Being a bride, it can be really stressful because all of them matter to you and you cannot just let them be on their own on your special day. Moreover, there can also be other unforeseen issues that can arise like a problem with the dresses, vendors showing up late, or even issues with the venue. Here we will discuss what you can do when your bridesmaids are being less than helpful.

Problem 1 – They Don’t Like the Dress

We all come in different shapes and sizes so the “one-style-fits-all” doesn’t really go over too well these days.  If you have chosen the dresses of your bridesmaids and they are not comfortable with it, you should think of a quick alternative. You may have already invested your time and energy to find the best available dress, but if they don’t like it, there is no point in forcing them. What you can do is arrange an alternative dress that they can wear. Let them choose the style and you decide the color. Of course, they should respect any limits you may have like no strapless, or nothing that comes above their knees.  In the end, they will feel more empowered and their confidence will shine through because they chose their favorite dress that will complement the event as well.

Problem 2 – I Don’t Want to Work

You should know that your bridesmaids are not your maids. They are your friends and they are here to share your happiness. You should try to treat them accordingly and ask other family members to attend them with care and concern. If they are asked to work time and time again, they will get annoyed and will want to leave as early as possible. Moreover, you can always include a male friend on your bridesmaid’s list because they will want to feel useful by helping out a little extra and keep things normal.

Problem 3 – Bridesmaids Don’t Like Each Other

There are chances that the bridesmaids may not like each other. In this case, what you can do is define areas where they will be working and limit their interactions to taking group photos, being in the ceremony and entering the reception.  If you have a wedding coordinator, have them act as a buffer when they foresee any possible conflicts arise.   It will take some of the pressure of you and make the rest of the bridal party calm so that your event will happily continue without any mishap. Just try to keep things simple as much as you can at your wedding ceremony.

Problem 4 – Bridesmaids Didn’t Show Up

One of the biggest problems that you may face is when your bridesmaids ditch you at the very last minute. All your plans are dependent on their presence and if they fail to show up, you can find yourself in serious trouble. For this problem, you should always have some backup. This is where you can ask your other friends to be ready for any kind of help that you would need.

These are some problems that you might face at your wedding ceremony. Using the solutions given above, you can easily cope with them and make your wedding ceremony a memorable one. If you like, you can also lean on the expertise of your wedding officiant to offer solutions for the ceremony, regardless of whether your wedding party is cooperative or not.  After all, it is your wedding day and all of your family and friends are there to celebrate you and your future spouse.